It was 18 years ago this week that my fragile, broken 48 year old Mother was no longer able to fight the cancer that had slowly destroyed her body for 6 years. She died in Gosford Hospital in the early hours of the morning on the 15th of January 2000. 18 years … sounds like a long time. Most days it does actually feel like another lifetime, an alternate universe, surreal and disconnected from the life I have rebuilt since that day. Other times I can easily recall the smells and sights, touching her forehead moments after she had died, spending time on my own in her room gathering her things in the hours after she left us.
THE SIMPLE WAYS I HAVE EMBRACED SLOWER LIVING:
It’s not easy. Embracing slower living goes against the fast moving tide of our modern world. My workplace in particular is as far from the slow living movement as you can imagine. Thankfully I adore my work in the charity sector and it only takes a few moments of mindfulness to focus on the impact it is having on the lives of others to centre myself. Some days it is harder than others though. It can creep up on you, the fast moving tide and the glorification of ‘busy’. Before you know it everything is vibrating with an unhealthy pace and you find yourself far from centre with that toxic energy you promised yourself you would avoid at all costs!
The Lessons of 2017 and Life on Purpose in 2018:
As I began to consciously unravel my 2017 using Susannah Conway’s ‘Unravel Your Year Workbook’ it became clear that I had allowed 2017 to just happen to me, rather than with any intention. At first I switched into critical mode, berating myself for allowing an entire 365 days to just happen. I cried, slipped into a bit of a dark place and then became aware that I had also suppressed a whole lot of my feelings, things that need to be felt.