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How to Survive Mothers Day

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A Mothers Day ‘Survival Guide’ is somewhat different to the plethora of Gift Guides doing the rounds. The reality is that Mother’s Day is a contradiction for some .. it can be a reminder of loss in so many ways, while at the same time it can also be a heart centred celebration. Behind the commercial (and often tasteless) side of this ‘day’ lies a complexity of potential emotions and sometimes even darkness.

Think about these aspects of Mother’s Day for a moment: the woman who aches to be a Mother yet has no partner or has experienced miscarriage or baby loss, the single Mother who may be a widow or a victim of abuse, the Motherless Mothers, the Mothers of children living with illness, disability or addiction.

Guest Posts Life Lessons Parenting

10 Things to be Grateful for about Motherhood {Guest Post}

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Jess and her lovely blog A Little Part of the World make the world a brighter place, she is one of those beautiful people who you come across online and you are instantly grateful for the connection. I love that Jess shares my passion for gratitude in particular, we both know the huge impact that this practice can have. Since I shared some of my photography tips for Jess and her readers she has been busy preparing this heartfelt list of things to be grateful for about Motherhood.

It is easy to become a little lost in the daily demands of our routines as Mums, at times it is somewhat overwhelming and I know that a lot of Mums are also living with anxiety and depression, as I am. Gratitude is a simple practice that has a huge impact, and spending some time each day to focus on the positives and the things that you are grateful for will make such a difference.

Motherhood is a blessing, the greatest role and the most privileged responsibility. It is not possible for some women and my heart hurts for you if you have ached for Motherhood and not experienced it yet. The reality for most parents is that it is also really hard at times, some days are filled with pain and frustration and learnings. As Mothers I wish that we were more united, free of judgement and always on the lookout for opportunities to lift each other up, wipe each others tears and share our stories with complete acceptance.

I am grateful to Jess for sharing so lovingly xx

10 Things to be Grateful for about Motherhood – by Jessica Flett

♡ The fact that you are a Mother

Sadly there are many Mothers to-be out there struggling with their dreams of conception and becoming a parent. If you are a Mother you have been blessed to get there however your path has unfolded.

♡ Newborn baby smell and cuddles

There are few things in life better than the smell and feel of your newborn baby. I would stick my head into their little necks and drink them in! I would happily sit for hours at a time cuddling my babies simply because they wanted to be close to me.

♡ Little voices saying “I love you”

That moment when your little one looks you in the eye and says “I love you” for the first time is overwhelming and brings tears to my eyes. (Miss 20 months said it for the first time recently and it is so wonderful to hear!)

♡ Seeing the world through their eyes

The innocence of children gives them a way of seeing the world so clearly. So much of what they do is for the first time and I am so grateful to experience these firsts and clarity again.

♡ Moulding and guiding your children, preparing them for the world

This is one of the hardest things about being a Mother, wondering if you’re doing it right and if you are helping them to be the best they can be. It is a challenge and a privilege. I’m grateful its my job..my most fulfilling role in life.

♡ Mothers love

It is the most powerful and unconditional love there is. I am moved to tears when I feel the ferocity of the love I have for my children. It is a wonderful feeling and I am constantly in awe of this!

♡ The endless supply of cuddles and kisses

I can’t get enough of the cuddles and kisses I get from my little ones. When they throw their arms around my neck and give me a big hug, all is right with the world. When they randomly come and give me a kiss it makes my day.

♡ Watching them grow

Babies become children who enter the world and take their place in the community. Every year we enter a new phase and reach new milestones. This year for us it is our eldest starting pre-school and our youngest turning two. They are growing so quickly and whilst I (sometimes) mourn the newborns they were, I also get a huge thrill watching them growing up and learning to behave socially, form friendships, learn and discover themselves.

♡ The next generation

Watching with pleasure as your child enters into the world of parenting. This is obviously a distance away for me but I know I can speak for my own Mother when I say that watching me become a parent, and getting to know her grandchildren, has been one of the greatest pleasures of her life.

♡ It’s not just about you anymore

It helps you put things into perspective and takes the ego out of your life. When you become a Mother life becomes so much more than just you. You are wholly responsible for another human being and whilst daunting at times I am so grateful that it has helped me get this perspective in life. Life is about the family we have created, it is so much bigger than any one person.

If you would like a little more Jess in your life you can find her here:

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Guest Posts Life Lessons Parenting

5 Steps to Peaceful Decision Making {Guest Post}

Peace of Mind

Five Steps to Peaceful Decision Making by Meg Garrido:

You love your children, of course you do. Perhaps staying at home with them is all you ever wanted to do, or maybe you are missing going to work and contributing your skills and knowledge to the workplace. It could be that you think you would like to work part time but you are worried about putting your child into childcare.

The options are endless. What do you do .. and what do you do with your children each day? I recently read an article which stated:

“The most important factors contributing to a Mother’s happiness and life satisfaction are not really about whether they are at home or in an office, its about whether or not they have made a mindful choice.”

Here are five tips to help you move through the decision making process and find peace of mind:

Identify all of the options

It is empowering if you are able to make a fully informed decision by laying out all of the options for consideration. There will be many in most situations, some with no immediate appeal however it is helpful to acknowledge them all.

Know what you really want

Spend some time being very clear about what it is that you really want to do, not what you think you should do or what others expect you to do. Deep down in your own heart what will make you happy?

Think through all of the pros and cons

Now you have considered all of the options and identified  what it is you really want, you should make a list of the pros and cons of your favoured option. It is important to make sure that you have the support you will need, that financially you are able to proceed and that the logistics of your decision are viable.

Make your decision. Commit. Communicate.

When you reach the stage of having an option that you are happy with and that works for you and your family you need to make a firm commitment to the decision. Avoid procrastinating and ensure that fear is not going to delay your decision. Make the choice and to prevent any further wavering, communicate your decision. Start talking to the people who you will need to work with to make it happen and also to your critical support network.

Don’t over think your decision

Focus on moving forward now that your decision is made and has been communicated. Enjoy the happiness that comes with this mindful process, celebrate the support you have around you. Don’t be rocked by those who don’t agree, or by the moments when you may have a wobble. Don’t allow yourself to keep analysing your decision and avoid talking about your decision or your worries repeatedly. This type of over thinking is not productive.

Know that there will be challenges along the way and there will be times when it will be hard for you to remember why you made your decision. Other people can play a big role in making you feel guilty about the decisions you have committed to.

Having gone through a thorough and mindful process as outlined in these steps, you will always have somewhere to return for reassurance. Remember what it is that you really wanted and how you came to your decision.

It is also important to remember that change can be difficult and to give yourself time to adjust. Treat yourself with kindness while you are in the process of implementing any major decisions. Lean on your support network and ensure that you take some time out for yourself during these busy and demanding periods in your life.

Guest Post Author: Meg Garrido

Meg is the Founder of Playroom to Boardroom, a community for working Mums and those planning to return to the workforce. Meg’s background is in corporate finance and she has qualifications in economics, accountancy, primary school teaching and personal training.

Meg enjoys keeping fit, reading and speaking on topics she is passionate about. Meg has two daughters, Violet aged 5 and Jasmine aged 3.

I was so pleased to hear from Meg recently and to learn more about her vision to support and encourage working Mums, the more places and resources we have to connect and inspire each other the better!